The Cargo Shorts Theory

Whats good people? I know its been two weeks but fuck all that!


Im back out of fake chilling to hand yall the logic behind wearing the number one essential piece of clothing to a nigga in the summer. No its not the du-rag (to some of your disappointment), those secrets must remained concealed. But yes the old trustworthy cargo shorts. You may wonder how can some shorts be symbolic of anything? Let me explain...

Summertime + Nice Weather + Cookouts = Fun and Happiness. All important variables to a nigga. But the variable in the equation that wants to make sure you fail that Math test is no other than...yup you guessed correctly......

 Your own personal estrogen (or girlfriend as some people would call it.)

A nigga likes to savor all the joys of summer in their entirety and without one single care in the world dawg. If your chick even think you having fun without her in the near vicinity please believe that she bringing out the shackles....aka pants. No nigga wants they limbs in solitary confinement b, especially when the temperture outside is cremate. Shits just not happening. Thats why we.......I mean niggas embraced the monumental and beloved cargo short. Niggas ankles can breathe and ashy shins can flourish flawlessly in these streets. So if your nigga leave the crib with his cargo's on, Nike's unlaced, and a healthy hairline dont be alarmed. Just be cautious of a few unanswered calls and tweet gaps on his TL. Nothing major. He with his homies but thinking of nothing else but you.

Oh and just a sidenote....if your nigga wears the classic jean shorts that are 3 sizes too big with dragons or some wild design on the back pockets you definitely dont value your estrogen. Just leave him, his flip phone, and mid top forces alone boo there is absolutely no reason you should have to explain to your friends why you are always as depressed as the straps swinging carelessly from his forces. Dont fall victim to the epidemic known as struggle.

Ok back to the impeccable theory at hand. Well now that I gave yall the symbolic meaning behind the wearing of cargo shorts you can cut your nigga some slack. Let him be great and dont worry a few ignored texts never hurt anyone. He is still thinking of you!

Oh....and most importantly fellas wear them with caution. Because you dont want to abuse the power they bring and then your girl have to bring out that double standards choppa....the big guns....the arch enemy of the cargo short. Also known as....THE SUNDRESS!!!!!!!

Im out until next time my niggas, yall be cool how yall be cool. Follow me @E_TRELL


Follow the team as well @I_WhiteMike @gritscapone and @Rell_Mac

Written by @E_TRELL