Let me start by saying that no offense should be taken from the title of this blog. Chances are many of you will get that ring you're dying for. On the other hand, many of you won't and I'm pretty sure it's going to be your own fault. I mean, I don't even know why us women are so adamant about getting a ring anyway. Marriage is complicated and not for everyone. I'm sure many of your parents marriages didnt work and some of you may have even tied the knot in the past and already renigged. Its just not
an easy task.
Furthermore, in a society pretty much built on social networking and celebrity influences how can we possibly expect most of these marriages to last. Maybe I'm being pessimistic but I like to look at myself as a realist. I sit behind my phone and computer daily and watch females obliterate any inkling of respect our generation has left for us, easily making the phrase "This is a mans world." seem like a solid fact. I'm not here to bash women by any means though, just trying to get you to close your mouths, curb your egos and open your minds. The ability to see the bigger picture is something females seem to lack.
When it comes to handling certain personal issues, women can't seem to get it right. I know they say women use more of their brains than men but there has to be a key piece we aren't using that majorly effects mental stability. I'm not a scientist by any means but I am a female and I do know a thing or two. So, without further ado, let's get right into it.. Here are the reasons why you my beautiful lady, probably won't get a ring on it.
1. LET HIM BREATH
I would say no man likes to be smothered but I don't think anybody really likes to be smothered. Women tend to try to over communicate, over step and just plain do too much.If he doesn't reply to your text that doesn't mean tweet. If he wants to go out for a night on the town with the fellas, let it be. Relationships don't mean you spend every waking minute together. Shit, you were born alone, you die alone. Too much of ANYTHING is not a good thing, even your man.
2. MAKE IT NASTY
Whatever that mouth do, make sure it "do" something nasty. You know how dudes say "No squares in my circle."? That goes for you too baby girl. Ain't nothing wrong with getting a little nasty. Be open and be adventurous.. In and out of the bedroom. Men and women were BORN to procreate. Not to say you shouldn't protect yourself, I'm just saying FUCKING IS NORMAL. Why not spice it up? Try an occasional strip tease or a lap dance (and that's lite work). 40 minutes of missionary is not gonna keep your mans sharp shooter in his Polo briefs. Everything you won't do, another bitch damn sure will.
3. THE "T" WORD
I know you're probably assuming T is for Tip Drill but that's for a whole other blog entirely. T stands for trust. Without trust, you my dear have nothing. Until you've got a reason (and a tweet to a female who lives 100 miles away is not a reason) not to trust your man, trust your man. That's the bottom line. Relationships are built on trust and doubt is normal BUT don't cast your dreary ass shadow of doubt over your relationship if the forecast ain't called for it. It's one thing to be a man (as in a being whose sex drive is turnt up 23 hours a day) who is cheating and therefore being rightfully accused but it's another thing to be a faithful man who is being wrongfully accused. This ruins relationships so mentally RT #3.
4. LEAVE THE PHONE ALONE
Imagine how much a kid would be disappointed when he found those Christmas gifts as he snooped through the closets when all this time he thought Santa was real... That's like looking through your mans phone, you ain't gonna find Santa bitch. So unless you're ready to POSSIBLY get your feelings hurt, don't touch the phone, don't hack the Twitter and stop checking his pockets. You aren't Carmen Sandiego boo, you're thirsty for something I can't even readily identify.
5. BE A LADY
Being a lady is so much more than wearing heels and make up. Not being able to cook is completely unladylike. As a woman you are built to nurture. Cooking meals is like breast feeding. Feed your baby. When I say feed I don't mean Hamburger Helper either. Read a cook book, watch the Food Network or call your mother. You might not be able to cook but if you have a HS diploma I'm pretty sure you can follow directions. Being a lady also means keeping things clean. Not because you HAVE to but because as a woman you should want to. Your man doesn't want to clean, he wants to make the money, eat the food, kill the pussy and play Madden '13. He's a man, fuck you expect? Besides cooking and cleaning for your man is like practice for your child because guess what, you've got to do a shit load more for the Jr.
** BONUS TIP
DO NOT BRING YOUR RELATIONSHIP ISSUES TO SOCIAL NETWORKS. A subtweet here and there is acceptable (even an @ can be tolerated) but I see you females really going for the gusto. Completely outing your man, exposing his secrets or throwing dirt on him via the world wide web is fuckin' ridiculous. If you have ever done any of these things, you my friend are most likely NOT getting a ring. You're supposed to hold it down, not turn it up....
Like I said, don't take offense. Just take heed. Most of you are probably doing 3 of the things I stated above. If you want a ring you've got to be normal. Being crazy isn't cute, its crazy. Find yourself before you seek love. Your insecurities can easily be your own demise!!!
Written Guest Blogger by @KillaKia
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